The “Duchess and the Diminutive Dwelling”: How Meghan Markle’s Frustrations with Her Royal Housing Led to Megxit

In a bombshell revelation, royal insider Tom Quinn has claimed in his bestselling book Yes Ma’am that one of the first signs of the “Megxit” saga — the moment Prince Harry and Meghan Markle chose to step back from their senior roles in the royal family — came from Meghan’s dissatisfaction with the “tiny” home she was assigned within the royal compound.

According to Quinn, the Duchess of Sussex, who had already experienced growing frustrations with palace life, was particularly bothered by the living arrangements at Nottingham Cottage, a modest residence on the grounds of Kensington Palace. The cottage, which was considerably smaller compared to the luxurious Apartment 1A where Prince William, Kate Middleton, and their three children were living, struck Meghan as a stark symbol of the perceived second-class treatment of her husband, Prince Harry.

This, Quinn argues, was just one of many signs that their relationship with the royal family — particularly with Harry’s position as the “spare” heir — was becoming strained, setting the stage for the couple’s eventual move to the United States in 2020. As Meghan’s frustrations deepened, so did her sense of alienation within the institution. It wasn’t just about the size of the house — it was a symbolic reflection of the marginalization Harry felt within the royal family.

The Start of “Megxit”

Quinn’s insights into the couple’s early days at Kensington Palace paint a picture of Meghan as someone deeply disillusioned with the royal family’s rigid hierarchy and the limited space in which she was expected to operate. The cottage, while still a property within the palace grounds, symbolized for Meghan the disparity between her and her brother-in-law’s family. It was a mere “diminutive dwelling” compared to the grand, sprawling apartment where William and Kate were living.

But it wasn’t just the size of the home that bothered Meghan. According to Quinn, Meghan’s dissatisfaction stemmed from a deeper sense of hierarchical inequality within the palace, which she felt was compounded by her and Harry’s secondary status. This frustration, Quinn argues, was the spark that set off the grievance process — with Harry gradually beginning to see himself not as a primary heir, but as a “spare”.

At the heart of these grievances was Meghan’s belief that the royal family was subtly, but consistently, belittling Harry’s role in comparison to William’s. As Meghan grew increasingly upset with the royal hierarchy and the lack of respect she believed they were receiving, it’s suggested that she helped Harry recognize the secondary role he had within the family, which contributed to the resentment that would eventually lead to their dramatic exit.

A Toxic Environment and Royal Tensions

Quinn’s book paints a vivid picture of how Meghan’s frustration played out behind palace doors. He claims that Meghan’s dissatisfaction was not only personal, but also professional. She reportedly bombarded palace staff with early morning emails starting at 5 a.m., creating what Quinn refers to as a “toxic environment”. These claims of toxic behavior, which Meghan has consistently denied, seem to paint a picture of someone who felt utterly trapped by her role within the royal family, channeling her discontent into the workplace.

As the tensions between Meghan, Harry, and the palace grew, these frustrations reportedly escalated until they reached Prince William himself. In his book, Quinn suggests that Meghan’s behavior created enough of an internal crisis to compel William to confront his brother. A “dossier of distress” — allegedly compiled by palace aides — was said to have been presented to William, containing details of the growing dissatisfaction and tension surrounding Meghan’s demands.

For William, the situation was a personal one. As the future king, he was caught in the middle of his brother’s growing desire for independence and the demands of the royal family. According to Quinn, William’s response was driven not just by a sense of duty, but by his growing concerns about the way Meghan and Harry were challenging the traditional royal structure. Their desire to break free was seen as a threat to the very fabric of the monarchy.

The Fallout and the Decision to Leave

Meghan and Harry’s decision to step back from their royal duties was sudden and controversial. Their move to North America and the subsequent announcement of their decision to leave the royal family in early 2020 sent shockwaves through both the public and the monarchy. Meghan’s frustrations with her status in the family, including the living conditions and her treatment within the institution, were certainly contributing factors, but the decision to leave was far more complex.

For many, the announcement marked the beginning of the now infamous “Megxit” saga — a name that quickly became synonymous with the couple’s exit from royal life and the subsequent tensions that followed. Harry and Meghan’s decision to step down was framed by them as a personal choice to live a life of more freedom and less public scrutiny. However, for the royal family and the British public, their move was seen as a betrayal of duty.

In addition to their exit, the couple’s increasing focus on their public image and involvement in social justice causes, as well as their multi-million-dollar deals with streaming giants like Netflix and Spotify, have further complicated their relationship with the British royal family. The couple’s shift toward American-style celebrity activism has been a consistent point of contention within the monarchy, with many members of the public and royal observers seeing it as a radical departure from traditional royal roles.

The Growing Rift: A Rift Between Brothers

As the months wore on, the rift between Harry and William grew deeper. The relationship between the brothers had always been complicated, but Meghan’s arrival and the growing frustration with royal life caused cracks to appear that would only widen over time. The brothers’ public differences became more pronounced, particularly after Harry and Meghan’s tell-all interview with Oprah Winfrey in 2021. In that interview, Harry opened up about the toxic dynamics within the royal family, speaking candidly about the lack of support from certain family members and the emotional toll of being the “spare”.

While William was said to be deeply hurt by Harry’s allegations, Harry’s frustration was clear: he no longer felt that he was part of the family, at least not in the way that he had once been. Meghan’s role in helping Harry find his voice was pivotal, as she encouraged him to speak out about the struggles they had faced within the monarchy, ultimately leading to their departure.

Looking Ahead: The Legacy of Megxit

Now, more than two years since the couple left the royal family, the story of “Megxit” continues to evolve. Harry and Meghan’s ongoing endeavors, from philanthropic ventures to their media projects, show no sign of slowing down. Yet, their relationship with the royal family remains strained, with Harry’s memoir and ongoing public appearances continuing to fuel the tension.

As for Meghan—the woman who was once the “outsider” who struggled to fit in—her presence in American culture has only grown. She and Harry have built a powerful brand, one that blends social justice, media influence, and personal activism. It remains to be seen how their story will unfold in the years to come.

For now, though, the story of Meghan and Harry’s departure serves as a stark reminder that, in the world of royalty, the personal is always political, and even the smallest frustrations can grow into full-blown crises. What started as a disagreement over a small house and feeling like “the spare” has led to a saga that has captivated the world—and could very well shape the future of the British monarchy.