Discipline, Respect, or Harm? Australia’s Ongoing Debate Over Spanking Children

Few parenting topics stir emotions as deeply as the question of spanking — or, as it is often described in Australia and the UK, “a disciplinary smack.”

For some, it is a reminder of their own childhoods: a quick slap on the bottom that, in their memory, defined boundaries, instilled respect, and taught consequences. For others, it is a troubling practice, a remnant of harsher times when obedience was demanded rather than taught, and when discipline could too easily slide into harm.

The conversation resurfaced recently after Roland Loizou posted a comment online that captured both nostalgia and conviction:

“Sorry but I have to disagree with people who are totally against spanking or a disciplinary smack on the bottom. My parents smacked me on the bottom. I didn’t hate them, I didn’t have trust issues with them because of it, I didn’t fear them. But I certainly respected them. I learned what my boundaries were and knew what would happen if I crossed them. I don’t believe I was abused, I was DISCIPLINED!”

His words reflect a sentiment held by many across generations. But do they reflect the direction Australia is moving in? According to a survey conducted by the ABC as part of the Australia Talks National Survey, the practice is slowly dying out.

The headline was blunt: “Is it OK to smack your child? Australians are divided, but the practice is dying out.”

The numbers told their own story: 47 per cent of Australians said it was acceptable, compared to 38 per cent who disagreed. The remainder were undecided.

It’s a division that cuts across age, culture, and personal history — and one that continues to ignite fiery debate in homes, schools, and parliaments.

A Divided Nation

Australia, like many countries, finds itself in a period of transition on this issue. What was once broadly accepted — even expected — is now increasingly questioned.

Parents of older generations often speak of being spanked as part of daily life. Some frame it as harmless, a form of swift justice that ended as quickly as it began. Others remember it less fondly, associating it with fear, humiliation, or resentment.

Younger parents, however, are more likely to turn toward non-physical forms of discipline: time-outs, withdrawal of privileges, or conversations about consequences. This shift is fueled by growing research, evolving social norms, and the influence of international debates where many countries have already outlawed corporal punishment in homes and schools.

Still, as the ABC survey shows, nearly half of Australians believe a smack on the bottom is acceptable. The nation is not yet settled on its view.

The Case for Spanking: Boundaries and Respect

Supporters of spanking argue that the practice, when used sparingly, teaches children about boundaries in a way no lecture or timeout can.

Their reasoning often draws on personal experience. Many recall being spanked themselves and insist they emerged from childhood respectful, disciplined, and closer to their parents rather than further away.

Roland Loizou’s words mirror this view. He recalls respecting his parents precisely because they set limits and enforced them consistently. For him, spanking was not cruelty, but clarity.

Other proponents argue that society has grown too permissive. They worry that without firm boundaries, children grow up without respect for authority, lacking resilience and discipline. To them, banning spanking outright risks eroding parental authority, replacing it with what they see as overly permissive parenting that leaves children without clear guidance.

The Case Against Spanking: Alternatives and Risks

On the other side of the debate stand those who argue that spanking is unnecessary, outdated, and carries risks.

Their case often begins with psychology. Numerous child development experts suggest that physical punishment, even when mild, can teach children that problems are solved through force. Critics argue it risks normalizing aggression, even if unintended.

There is also the concern of escalation. What begins as a light smack in one family can cross into harsher punishment in another, blurring the line between discipline and harm. Critics contend that this ambiguity is why more and more countries are banning the practice outright — to remove any space for misinterpretation.

Beyond risks, opponents emphasize alternatives. They point to studies showing that positive reinforcement, clear communication, and consistent non-physical consequences can be just as effective — and build long-term trust between parent and child.

The Global Picture

Australia’s division reflects a broader global debate.

Sweden was the first country to ban corporal punishment in the home, doing so in 1979. Since then, more than 60 countries have followed.

New Zealand banned spanking in 2007, a move that initially caused uproar but has since become widely accepted.

The United States remains divided, with laws varying by state and attitudes often split along cultural and political lines.

Australia sits in the middle. It has banned corporal punishment in schools, but parents are still legally allowed to administer “reasonable” physical discipline at home. The definition of “reasonable,” however, remains contested and subjective.

Culture, Class, and Memory

One of the reasons this debate remains so heated is that it touches on identity.

For many Australians, spanking is part of cultural heritage. Migrant families, rural communities, and older generations often see it as part of how they themselves were raised. To question it feels like questioning their parents — or their own judgment as parents.

For others, the practice symbolizes a world they’d rather leave behind. They speak of classrooms where teachers carried rulers or belts, homes where “discipline” masked deeper dysfunction, and the silence of children who feared speaking up.

Personal memory plays a powerful role. Two siblings may both have been spanked, yet remember it in entirely different ways: one with gratitude, another with pain. This subjectivity ensures the debate remains deeply personal, often emotional, and rarely resolved.

What the Research Says

While memories differ, research provides a broader perspective.

Studies generally suggest that while spanking may achieve immediate compliance — a child stopping a behavior on the spot — it does not build long-term understanding of consequences. Instead, many researchers find that non-physical discipline fosters more lasting behavioral changes.

A number of studies also point to correlations between frequent physical discipline and negative outcomes later in life, including behavioral issues and strained parent-child relationships.

However, critics of these studies argue that they often fail to distinguish between occasional light spanking and harsher forms of physical punishment. They contend that lumping them together unfairly skews results.

This scientific back-and-forth mirrors the broader social debate: a clash between data, culture, and personal testimony.

Politics and Policy

Given the division, it’s unsurprising that the political arena treads cautiously.

Calls for a national ban on spanking in Australia arise periodically, often supported by child welfare organizations and international rights advocates. Yet lawmakers hesitate, knowing the backlash such moves provoke.

The tension lies between parental freedom and child protection. Advocates of a ban argue that children deserve the same legal protection from physical force as adults. Opponents argue that governments should not interfere in parenting choices unless harm is clear.

As of now, the law remains unchanged: parents may discipline their children physically, provided it is “reasonable.”

Toward a Future Without Smacking?

Despite the division, trends suggest the practice is slowly fading. Younger parents are less likely to spank, schools have long outlawed it, and discussions about positive parenting are growing louder.

The ABC survey headline captured this reality: even though nearly half of Australians still find spanking acceptable, its days may be numbered. Cultural shifts often move slowly until, suddenly, they seem inevitable.

In 20 years, spanking may be as unthinkable to Australians as smoking inside schools or driving without a seatbelt. Or it may persist in private homes, defended by those who view it as harmless tradition.

What’s certain is that the debate will continue, as it has for decades.

Conclusion

The question of spanking touches on far more than discipline. It is about memory, culture, identity, authority, and love. It asks each generation to weigh the lessons of the past against the knowledge of the present — and to decide what kind of future they want for their children.

Roland Loizou’s words remind us of the complexity:

“I don’t believe I was abused, I was DISCIPLINED!”

For him, spanking was a boundary that shaped respect. For others, it is a painful memory they would never repeat.

Australia’s survey numbers show the divide clearly: nearly half still support the practice, more than a third oppose it, and the rest remain unsure.

Perhaps that uncertainty is the real story. A nation caught between old traditions and new understandings. A conversation that refuses to settle because it reaches too deeply into who we are, how we were raised, and how we hope to raise the next generation.